Wednesday

Frigageddon




Hulkageddon IV kicks off this weekend.

There will be tears and cheers resonating throughout New Eden.
Almost certainly not in equal measure.

What new and innovative ways that will be found to bring carebears to their knees have yet to unfold, and  no doubt the event will provide much entertainment for it’s duration.
I for one am looking forward to participating. Although ganking miners is already a favourite pastime of mine,
 (pun intended) and one that I certainly do not limit to the scheduled event.

Recipe for 1 Hulk suicide gank:


Ingredients

1 covert alt (any cloaky ship will do.)
4 or more cheap t1 fitted destroyers (preferably thrashers.)
1 Hulk (if Hulks cannot be found any mining barge will suffice.)
1 concord spawn per thrasher (these are not available in any supermarket but CCP will kindly provide them)

Method

First take covert alt to a belt, ice belts are particularly juicy and usually bear the most fruit.

Locate hulk.

Position alt gently at optimal small artillery gun range, being careful not to decloak and thus frighten the poor helpless miner.



Jump the thrasher fleet into system, immediately warp to cloaky alt announcing your favourite greeting into local.
Examples include but are not exclusive too:
YARRRRRRR,  (The more Rs the better, especially good for long system warps)
TALLY HO, (For the refined ganker)
MUIRA BUTTS, (the reasoning behind this is a well guarded secret)
These are not the Roids you were Looking for, (This is really best kept as a last resort)

Upon landing open fire on hulk immediately, click annoying anti gank message to allow you to watch shields, armor and structure disappear and hulk go baddaboom.



Keep watching as CCP adds a generous sprinkling of Concord.

Watch own shields, armor, hull disappear
 N.B. this happens very quickly try not to panic.

Warp pod out.
 N.B. a celestial is better than a gate to avoid embarrassing session time pod outages.

Watch for tears in local whilst cloaky alt loots wrecks and salvages. 
N.B. If hulk pilot was also poded don’t watch local for tears, instead watch mail icon and wait for it to flash.


HOWEVER.....

As we all know plans are overated.



Sometimes Hulks don’t die !!!! 
This is usually due to a fleet mate disconnecting and thus insufficient firepower being present.

Sometimes the thrashers can warp out before concord arrive!!!
 Laedy managed this epic feat and warped around Teon for 15 mins avoiding concord. N.B this is a Pro move and is unlikely to be repeated any time soon, personally I suspect PL HAX.

Sometimes the carebears anticipate your moves
and place faction frigates on the lowsec gate in highsec  to intercept your thrasher squad.

And sometimes 
you enter the system the other way, and instead of killing the hulk you kill the dramiel and his pod that was waiting to grab yours.

Also another good point to note is that suicide ganking requires no drones whatsoever ;)

3 comments:

  1. Awesome post, Ariartus. (Spoken in a nice posh voice) . . . and thanks for the . . .erm, link/plug. :D


    Butts.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Loving it Aria!
    And yes, I promise not to abuse my PL HAX powers for evil, a lot. maybe.
    I love my little Molden Heath holidays with you guys :D

    ReplyDelete
  3. "Also another good point to note is that suicide ganking requires no drones whatsoever ;)" <-- Not if you man up and use a Catalyst :)

    Nice post.

    ReplyDelete